More about us
Hello and thanks for your interest in Aspieology. I'm Reggie, the Creator and Co-founder and if you're like me, you likely have a list of bad experiences and anxieties about dating, or unsuccessful relationships. Trust me, you're not alone, and that's why my son and I created Aspieology.
Our website was designed to be a place to begin making new friends or to igniting meaningful relationships. We try our best to make it safe to be yourself here, and you'll find others who share and embrace your unique traits, characteristics and talents. And no, of course not all "atypical/atypical" relationships are a guarantee for long-term success, but I can only speak from my own experience.
"...many of us have learned to camouflage our true nature... a survival skill we've learned: You know, put on a smile and just fit in."
Learning to date online
Several years ago, after moving to Los Angeles, I was faced with the challenge of dating in a city that's often described as both the loneliest place to live, and the serial-dating capital of the world. To make matters worse, LA has far more single men than women, so the odds weren't exactly in my favor.
I was terrified about dating in LA, but also wanted companionship and connection. So, after months of trial and error, I began adapting to the online dating protocol that nobody seemed to talk about, and the things that many aspies struggle with, without realizing it.
I joined a variety of dating sites and started discovering ways to easily connect with people. After a few months, I was dating actors, doctors, entrepreneurs, musicians, teachers, yoga instructors and other neurotypicals. Eventually, on one of those dates, I met a great gal and was engaged a year later; however, despite being an online-dating success, our relationship dead-ended. Although I'd learned the skills needed for online dating, there was just something missing.
During this period, we'd moved from California to New York City where I was attending graduate school. Originally from a small town in the Midwest, Manhattan was a fascinating, perplexing yet overwhelming experience. Living in NYC requires a lot of face-to-face interaction with others, and this wasn't something I was thrilled about.
"I came to understand how an atypical person could learn to be a successful dater, yet a failure at attracting the ideal relationship or partner."
Over time, I became an unintentional "student" of human interaction, and the subways provided a unique classroom to observe how people interfaced with each other. One day, I had that "aha moment," as I came to understand how an atypical person could learn to be a successful dater, yet a failure at attracting the ideal relationship or partner.
The Answer: I was trying to hide my "atypical" nature rather than embracing it!
In an effort to act more neurotypcial, many of us have learned to camouflage the true nature of our unique personality traits. And, this certainly isn't done out of deception, but rather a survival skill we've learned: You know, put on a smile and just "fit in."
"...at some point, be it from stress or exhaustion, those atypical traits always seem to emerge."
If you've ever been in a relationship, at some point, be it from stress or exhaustion, those atypical traits always seem to emerge. And, when that happens, a relationship can start down a path to ruin. Oddly, at the end of my relationships, there was a certain relief that came from feeling I didn’t need to "act" anymore.
Finally, curiosity lead me to wonder if other atypicals had similar experiences, since meeting other people with similar traits could make friendships, dating and relationships easier. And, this is the genesis that eventually became our purpose.
Thanks for giving Aspieology a whirl!
Creator & Co-founder of Aspieology®
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